Three months

It's the last day of March, which means it's been 3 months since "the incident".  Technically, more than 3 months, but I'm not doing a day countdown or anything.

I figured since I don't really talk about it all that much on here that I would provide an update for anyone interested.

Things have been getting easier.  I thank my family and friends for really being as supportive as they have been.  They've listened to me bitch, they've been wonderful distractions when needed, and they've given good advice when requested.

I find that I can watch movies, tv shows, read wedding blogs, listen to love songs and no longer cry.  Is it hard to see/hear things that remind me of him and our relationship?  YES.  Are there still times when I catch myself saying "us" or "our" or thinking of things that remind me of him?  ABSOLUTELY.  But I don't cry as easily as I used to and it doesn't sting to think about or say things anymore.

In the grand scheme of it, I'm indifferent.  Is that one of the steps??  Complete indifference?   I just really could care less.  What he does, who he talks to....  The only thing that still triggers any emotional response from me is when he takes too long to respond to my emails.  Oh, and the fact that he has STILL not given me a response to what he wants to do with the house.  There will be an email going out tomorrow about this fact.

I do still find it cathartic to talk about it.  Not that I invite the questions left and right, but I appreciate that people don't treat me with avoidance about the issue anymore.

And as time continues to pass, I get more and more excited about what I get to do with my life now.  I feel a little like I got a "do-over", and I have the chance to do things I wanted to do and hadn't done yet.  Small things like decorate my next apt/house/condo/whatever EXACTLY how I want.  To bigger things like running a half marathon.  I'm excited about the flexibility in my life right now and the fact that I get a second chance to just focus on me. 

I love me. :)

Wednesday Fun...

because I just couldn't resist posting it.  She cracks me up.  I love watching her try to imitate what you do when you make faces at her. 

And that face... that face she makes when she's standing is priceless!

who plays volleyball at 9pm on a weeknight?

I'm serious....  I don't think you should have to play volleyball at 9pm just to get a game in.  It leaves me seriously exhausted the next morning.

I used to like working out at night.  I seem to have more energy and stay focused in the evenings, so night time work outs were great for me.  Then again, when I was working out at night, I didn't have to get up at 5am the next morning.  So I guess things are relative.  It's hard to get home at 11pm and still have to shower and wind down from the work out.

Last night was especially rough since I am confident that I strained some tendons in my left thumb.  It's twice the size as the right one.  Good thing I'm not left-handed. :)

I employed a "fake out" method today so that I could hopefully convince myself and my coworkers that I'm not really as tired as I feel...  specifically speaking, I made an effort getting dressed this morning.  Usually on Tuesdays after a late night of volleyball, I just throw on something comfortable (and usually kind of frumpy) and run out the door.  Not today.  Today is a nice outfit and actual make up.  The hair was wet, but the effort was there.

Also, Amanda... I know it's a pencil skirt (again), but I belted it this time.  See, I listen!

*blouse - express, skirt - Jcrew, belt - express, shoes - nine west, earrings - gifted from Lis :), hair - librarian-esque, no?

Goals Check-in: March Round Up

I just realized that today is March 28th... which means I should've done my goals check-in on Friday.  Oops.  Well, better late than never...
1. SAVE MONEY, REDUCE DEBT: Going pretty well.  I had "forgotten" about my savings account and the money that is being automatically transferred there.  This is a good thing.  It goes unnoticed, which means I won't touch it.  Still waiting on my tax return to help chip away at the debt.  I make all my payments on time, so that's a plus at least.
2. GET BACK IN SHAPE:  This is going well.  I'm on my 4th week of training for the half marathon and I'm pleased at how well I am doing on the runs.  Saturday I ran 3.5 miles, which I'm pretty sure is the longest I have ever run.  It was kindof chilly out, but the sun was shining.  I found a good run I think will work for these middle distance runs. 
I think when the weather gets nicer out and I can regularly schedule my runs that I will try to mix in my 30 Day Shred video as well.  I actually miss doing the strength exercises and I do notice a difference since I stopped. 

Also, the eating habits have taken a hit since my roommates (sorry Lis...)  So I am probably going to have to figure out how to get back on that. 
3. STEP OUT OF MY COMFORT ZONE:  Eh.... it was okay.  As Amanda quoted last week, "that's alot of pencil skirt."  So apparently I need to branch out a bit.  Noted Amanda... noted.

I do still plan to wear pencil skirts often since I have several in my closet.  I'll try to mix it up some more.  I'm struggling with this goal a bit.  I've been really tired lately so it hinders my willingness to take extra time in the morning to get ready.  I am running the marathon in the summer which is WAY out of my comfort zone, so that's good.  April will be my month to be creative and think of other ways I can achieve this goal.  I think there will be several opporuntities to do so, I just have to keep my eyes open.

So all in all, I think I'm doing pretty well on my goals so far.  April and May are going to be VERY busy months for me.  I have a family wedding, my work conference, girls trip to Mexico and a quick stop over in Chicago.... all before Memorial day.
Happy Monday (and bonus outfit)!

*Sweater - Jcrew, Shirt - Victorias Secret, Skirt - Express, Tights - Target, shoes - Nine West 

I'm so annoyed I have to weay tights and it's almost April!

too much social media?

I've been thinking alot lately... how much is too much when you talk about the social media circus that we deal with now.

There's Facebook, myspace (if you still use it), LinkedIn, twitter, tumblr, flickr, blogging....  should I keep going?

Recently, I've started a tumblr account to see what all the fuss was about.  This is usually how it starts for me.  I create an account because apparently it's the coolest thing ever and decided after playing around in it for a few weeks if I want to continue to use it or not.  Facebook is so far the only thing on the list that I really enjoy.  I deleted my myspace acount ages ago and before that there was friendster.  I dabbled in twitter before I quickly got bored and deleted my account (though I still have an account for work).  I have a linkedIn account, but I still don't really understand why I should be on LinkedIn.  As you can see, I blog as it's convenient to me (this is not my first blog and probably not my last...). 

So I testing Tumblr... we'll see in a few weeks how that's going.  It sounds like a cross between blogging and twitter, which in that case, makes it sort of redundant doesn't it?

Music Thursday

They played this song at the end of an episode of Mad Men in Season one.

I love Mad Men (clearly) and was excited to add this song to my ipod.  It also really makes me want to take a trip to NYC.

I like to sing this song out loud in the car on the way home... Yes, I am that person.

case of the Mondays...

...on Wednesday.  Awesome.

I'm sad today, really sad.  For no one identifiable reason or cause.  Maybe its the rainy, dreary weather we are having today that has something to do with it.

I've been thinking alot about things lately...  reliving, trying to deal, how to handle where I am currently.  I'm sure that has something to do with it.

I could use another weekend of quiet time in sweats watching movies and napping.

That's all for today... sorry blog stalkers (MEL!).